Really? Seriously? Smoking can kill me? ..and get me a big check?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24242819/
Fla. smokers to split $600 million tobacco fund
Cigarette manufacturers had set up fund to be paid if appeal failed
MIAMI - Tens of thousands of ill Florida smokers and families of those who died are lining up for a share of a $600 million fund created by major tobacco companies as part of a 14-year-old lawsuit against cigarette manufacturers. The Florida Supreme Court in 2006 threw out a massive $145 billion damage award in the case, but the tobacco companies had previously set up the fund to be paid out even if the appeal failed. Last week, a Miami judge ordered the money divided equally among all Florida smokers who became ill before Nov. 21, 1996. “It applies to people across the state of Florida,” said attorney Bob Kelley, who added Monday his firm will represent about 1,000 smokers or family members.
Cigarettes/Cigars/Pipes/Chewing Tobacco = A dead you
Pissing on the 3rd rail of the subway train = A dead you
Taunting the tigers at the zoo without noticing that one of them is actually loose = A dead you
Cleaning a loaded gun with your finger on the trigger = A dead you
Flying Jihad Airlines with a USA 2 RAGHEADS 0 T-shirt = A dead you
Crossing or having any dirt on the Clintons (Urban Legend…get it?) = A dead you
Man…who knew? I will be glad when the government finally tells me that cheeseburgers will make me fat. Until then…nom nom nom nom nom….(waiting for my fat check from McDonald’s) nom nom nom
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